… when looking for a “label”. An excerpt I like to quote from Edain McCoy’s book – If you want to be a Witch page 7:

Two thousand years ago, Europeans did not define themselves as Witches or Wiccans. Even the word “Pagan”, derived from the Latin paganus, meaning “people of the earth,” wasn’t one people applied to themselves. The labeling of various cultural Craft traditions as Wicca, Wicce, Wita, Witta, or Wice is a twentieth-century addition to the Craft. In the clan and tribal societies of old Europe, religion and spirituality were woven into the fabric of everyday life. One might be said to possess wicca or have witta, meaning that he possesses a special skill or knowledge, but such a person would not label his religion that way. He would have been more likely to say he was a follower of a particular patron deity or was a priest of a deity within a specific cultural pantheon.

…

Well, two things really to contemplate. Labels and “woven into everyday life” rather than a set apart entity to MAKE time for.

OK, that was an experience and a half. Not bad enough I had that birthday party on Saturday that I “had” to go to, but I also struggled with a caffeine overdose.

I struggle to drink a liter a day, but sweating a lot with training (sure you wanted to hear that ) I really have to start drinking a lot more. Most programs recommend a lot of water and herbal and/ or green tea. I am neither a coffee nor tea drinker so caffeine has never been an issue for me. Over the last week I had some green tea and on Friday night I sat down and had about 1 1/2 thermos flask (about 5 -6 cups) of green tea and started to feel all shaky and hyper. Why did I drink that much? It was all cold and windy outside so the tea tastes even better. I poured the rest down the sink because that is when I realized what I am actually doing to myself. I was worried that I won’t be able to sleep that night, but I passed out as usual. I woke up in the middle of the night with a headache and took some tablets. The times have well and truly gone where I was just able to sleep headache off, now I have to take something or it will get 10 times worse.

In the morning my resting heart rate was raised, I was still shaky and hyper, headache and felt nauseous. WOW! And people drink this stuff (coffee …) on a regular basis????? OK, I admit I went over the top, but I am sure there are a lot of people out there that drink this amount on a daily basis easily. I am now wondering if I was still on caffeine that caused all my problems the next day or if it was my withdrawal from it.

Now I am not really sure what to do. After this episode I know I can do without caffeine in the future, but at the same time everybody goes on about green tea and the health benefits associated with it. Well, at least in moderation and not like me drowning in the stuff .

I had a look in my tea book to see what they say about the tea and there is a long list of positive effects, but as usual, take everything with a pinch of salt. I guess you also know that green tea should not be used with boiling water or it will taste bitter. Let it cool down a bit. What was new to me is the following which I found quite helpful:

For a stimulating cup of green tea you let it steep for 90 seconds. I never leave the leaves in longer because I don’t like the strong taste of the tea. 5-6 cups of stimulating green tea certainly explains why I was hyper .  

For a milder cup you let the leaves steep for 5 minutes. 

For less caffeine you steep the leaves for 90 seconds, pour the tea away and then use the same leaves to steep for 5 minutes.   

Sounds like worth a try. I am just wandering if the healthy benefits get poured down the sink as well which makes it pretty pointless to drink it in the first place.

I guess I suffered from a different kind of hangover the next day. Things you do for your health or is it just me ?

My daughter brought home the schools newsletter with the following thought:

“Keep your mind curious, your heart pure, and your enthusiasm twelve inches taller than you are” 

Have a good week

I had to go to a birthday party yesterday that my little daughter was invited to. The whole class went so I did not want my little one to be the odd one out. I do these things for her entertainment and certainly not for mine. I really struggle to sit down and make small talk because I am just not interested in doing so. I am approaching 40 next year and had about 3 good friend in my life. Two have moved on due to army life and one is actually an online friend for the last years. Am I sad? Am I picky? I don’t know, but I rather be by myself than put up with gossip, bitchyness or chit chats about the latest boob job in celebrity land. I tried my best yesterday to be part of it for about half an hour and then just walked away and sat around the corner watching the kids for another 2 hours rather than sit and chat. It can be a very lonely life especially with husband on exercise as well, but I rather do this than force myself to be social.

The radio keeps going on about making sure to have a “flu friend” just in case we get hit by the swine flu. This way your friend can get some shopping in or medication while you are housebound. Well, I am dipped and hope if it does strike it will hit me and my husband at different times so we can look after each other and the kids.

In all my life I have never managed to be part of a group that I feel comfortable with or like being with. That might makes you wonder why I give fitness classes, but these are not social gatherings. If you manage to talk throughout, you are obviously not working hard enough and we have to change that . So, this is not down to me being to shy, but just down to the fact that I am not interested. The solitary path is therefore the obvious choice for me although I am not sure if a pagan group with shared interests would make a difference. Honestly? I don’t think so. It is just the way I am.

I got a packed of eggs out of the fridge earlier and checked the date to see if they are still ok. Look at the numbers at the bottom left.

 11.11

Coincidence? Again? I think not!

In case you are wondering what I am talking about, refer to the entry below this one.

Now here is one that always leaves me wondering and I am not even sure when it started. Maybe a year ago or is it already longer???? I noticed that I seem to look at a digital clock every now and then when it says exactly 11:11. What a funny coincidence, but just left it at that. These moments where/ are getting more and more to the point that this is not just coincidence anymore. Now before you think I sit next to the clock and wait untill it turns 11:11 then I have to disappoint you. As a matter of fact, I only see these number when I am not thinking about them. You turn around and there they are again. I have been meaning to ask about this so many times, but I keep forgetting about the number untill I see it again. This time, yes it happened again today, I do not want to let this matter go again. What the heck is it all about? What the heck is it trying to tell me. Who the heck is trying to tell me something?

I now had a quick look online to see what the net has to say. Well, I have found the following site: 1111 Spirit Guardians, but find it a bit of the hook. I am therefore open to any other suggestions, ideas, input … that are a bit more down to earth. I am also wondering if it suppose to be a date. 11.11. next week, or is it November 2011??? Who knows, but it is starting to freak me out because it is just to many times that I see the number.   

I also just found this one: 11:11 Digital Time Code. The explanations further down on this page sound a bit more plausible.  

Please feel free to insert the X-files tune here ….. .

I am not quite sure how I ended here again, but for some reason I found more books that can be read online. Please keep in mind that I have not read them, don’t know how many pages are there … To find out more you simply have to read them.

It is Magical Hearth by Janet Thompson that brought me here which I own as a book. If I like a writer I usually check what else they have written that I could be interested in. The book I am reading right now is actually online as well. Just have a look here:

Magical Hearth   

Looking up other books by Janet Thompson I came across the following and I thought you might be interested:

Of witches: celebrating the Goddess as a solitary pagan also by Janet Thompson

Goddess Worship, Witchcraft and Neo-Paganism

Witchcraft: Theory and Practice

If you already read some of the books it would e nice to leave a comment to get some sort of idea if they are worth the effort.

I have found an interesting approach to candle magic in the book Magical Hearth/ Home of the modern pagan/ by Janet Thompson page 38.

The usual way to extinguish a candle is by snuffing it out, but never blowing it out. Blowing it out is according to some views disrespectful to the element fire, but also blows away the wish or something like that? Hm, is that not the point of it???? OK, getting back to Janet Thompson view:

… Throughout the world, ancient tales talk of the Witches’ Breath. More predominant in old Gaelic folklore, the breath of witches or wise-women was said to have magical properties. She could heal a wound with her breath. She could breathe life into a new-born babe and take breath from the dying to ease their journey to the Summerlands.

The blowing out of a candle as opposed to the pinching of a candle is prefered by many Wiccans; I prefer breathing the candle out. When I blow a candle out I never fail to take that tiny yet golden opportunity to re-enforce whatever I am currently working on. I ask that the smoke from my candle mix with the power in the breath that gives me life, and that my intentions are lifted to the Goddess…

I have to admit that I find this approach a lot more comprehensible. The union of air and fire and in this case the life-giving breath. How can this be disrespectful to either element?

The world is about give and take. You can’t just expect to receive all the time when you are never prepared to share to keep a balance. I asked for help, received it and make sure I repay it where ever possible, but there are times where I could just scream. This week there was a lady sat outside the shops in front of the trolleys begging for money because as the note said: I am hungry! Ignored by most shoppers I went to give her money hoping she would buy food with it. A bit later I see her standing in the same spot having a cigarette break. Is it just me that sees something wrong with this picture? If you are off that bad, how come they can afford to buy cigarettes? Here again I think it was a mistake to give her money because she is taking the micky. I feel betrayed for my deed, because this is not what I want to support. It stops me from giving people money on the streets for exactly that reason, but the next person might really would need it for food. How are you to know?  

I also keep donating our bottles to a cause where the money of the returned empties will be “converted” into food that will be given to the homeless. Hell, I am looking at a blinking machine taking the bottles, press a button and hope for the best. Do I really know any homeless will get food for that? Also, I think the supermarket should give the left over food to the homeless anyway and not just wait for some donations of the customers. Why? What else will they do with the food apart from adding it to the landfill?

You know what the sad thing is about the donation machine? When asking about the receipt that you get from the machine in the shop, nobody could answer it because nobody ever donates. We are talking pennies here, but people are not even prepared to give that amount to others. Also with that lady in front of the trolleys, people look away. 

I am grateful every day for what I have got and know fully well that there are others less fortunate. Nobody is to be expected to save others or the world single-handedly, but if everybody would make just a little contribution it would help so many others.

After watching one of Oseaana’s videos (I think it was the following):

the subject Witchcraft went through my head again. This is another area with a lot of squabbles in the pagan community where I wonder again why people can’t just accept and respect. Everybody has their right to an opinion, but don’t try and force them on everybody else or you are missing the point. There are no doctrines, no laws, no written in stone how any pagan path should look, but only man-made limitations forced on you to comply.

What is it that I am getting my knickers in a twist about? Oseaana from The Moonlit Sea explains in her video above in a nutshell that Voodoo is a religion while Hoodoo is a magical system pretty much like Wicca is a religion and Witchcraft a magical system. Some of you will now nod in agreement while others will scream in outrage and want to voice their disapproval. STOP! Take a deep breath and chill.

Like many others I don’t have a problem with Oseaana’s view. Quite the opposite. Although I like to add that I don’t know enough about Voodoo or Hoodoo to make any kind of “judgement” about it, but I do agree with the Wicca/ Witchcraft part. To ME it is simply a CRAFT, but for those who wish to bring a religious aspect to it can do so because it is an INDIVIDUAL choice. To ME the path is what you make it and not what somebody else dictates it to be. These are again man-made limitations maybe to create some order in a system that is so beautifully versatile, but it is these limitations that stop a lot of people to walk a path because they feel suffocated (again). Repressed by views that are forced upon a free spirit trying to live their spirituality in a way that they feel happy and comfortable with. Stop listening to X or Y and start listing to your inner voice. Make informed judgments and apply what feels right to YOU.

But also keep in mind that you can’t make a horse out of a cow, so keep things in perspective/ realistic.